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We always set an agenda: So that the debate will be to the point
We always have a structure: For conversations to be derived to the agenda easily, quickly and without wasting energy, we set set of questions & process.

Example:
1) Tell us about your God.
2) Define it.
3) How did we get there.
Democracy works both ways: Just because we are liable to be patient and considerable to people, it doesn't mean we do not deserve the same. 

People who can't be civil and are beating around the bush shouldn't be encouraged.